Comment 'n Criticize Boutique


 Topic: Comment 'n Criticize Boutique
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  Posted on September 29, 2013 11:48
CnCBoutique
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
Baki Fan

Posts: 2
Joined on:
September 29, 2013
#1
gdrIcBj.png
Banner made by Kono

Welcome to the Comment 'N Critique Boutique. The purpose of this topic is the following: Character Creators to get their characters reviewed, criticized and actually read by character makers with experience.

Keep in mind the following A.K.A. RULES!:

•The people that will review your characters don't need to do it. Be patient and if you are seeing that nobody reviewed your character, either point the post out again or consider it rejected from review.
•Each person will have different requirements for each character like the minimum amount of quality a character would have or other things they deem noteworthy in reviews. If your character isn't getting any attention or was rejected, don't gloat on our topic over it.
•You cannot post the same character over and over again. It's okay if you just modified it to fit someone else's system of reviews but if you post it several times you will eventually be reported for spamming.
•You cannot post someone else's work. I know that seems stupid to even mention, but some person might just be this dumb. Trust us.
•This topic is only for reviews. You will be posting a review request which has a format which is presented in another post. It's possible for us to actually have a good number of workers so we need this format to know to whom and/or from whom this review is supposed to come from. Otherwise, we do not want your dumb comments.
Seriously, we don't need dumb comments.
Don't post any comments. Just characters you want reviewed or reviews. This is not a social topic.
•This is a topic for character reviews. That means listing as a picture set is gonna be denied.
•Do not come here bashing any worker. Each person has an opponent different to your own. If you are gonna be butthurt about it, don't ask them to review your characters.

In order to be able to be reviewed you need to use this character review application:

Character: (Here you'd provide a link to your character)
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Any/(A Person's Name)/(A List Of Persons)
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: (Everyone Listed/Mentioned)/(At Least A Review)/(A Specific Number of Review Which Can't Exceed How Many Workers You Listed)
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes/No
Side Notes Regarding The Character: (Optional)
Were You Satisfied With Your Previous Review From This Person: Yes/No/Never Tried Them Yet. (Optional)

How to become an worker:

•You need to PM sasuke1vs1naruto with your reviewing system, your experience (as in how many years you have been doin custom characters, or months, or whatever) and your custom character achievements all up till now.
•As a worker you will need to have a custom system, so you will have to show in the PM I need three examples. A review of 1-4/10, a review of 5-7/10 and an 8+ one.

Example of a review system:

Pictures: ?/2
Balance: ?/4
Flow: ?/2

Pictures: Good, blah blah
Balance: OP but, blah blah.

Anyway, you get the idea.

What Privileges You Have As A Worker:
•A post solely for your rules, prizes, guides and where you can link different stuff about your custom character doings. (That doesn't mean you can post your facebook or an AmA there) You can only have one post which will be linked from a list I will make.
•Ability to criticize other people's work, however harsh you want, while them asking you for it. (In limit of the forum rules)
•Priority in criticizing from current workers which agree with that.

Workers:
~sasuke1vs1naruto (Click To Get To His Regulations Towards Reviewing)
~Luvixi (Click To Get To His Regulations Towards Reviewing)
~roia (Click To Get To His Regulations Towards Reviewing)
  Posted on September 29, 2013 11:48
sasuke1vs1naruto
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
U Wat M8

Posts: 12016
Joined on:
November 25, 2008
#2
Hello. I am the person you will hate the most on this topic. I will start off by saying this. Don't even expect a 10/10. Don't expect a 9. Or an 8. Because you most certainly don't have the skills to get it. Yes, you heard me. Skills.

Disclaimer: Besides being a dick, I am also honest about what i say. This is truly my opinion so respect it. This includes personal preferences. I am not reviewing it as a character that everyone might like.

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Rules:

•You can't submit characters with more than an additional skill or more than two additional lines for each skill. If your template is altered, depending on how altered it is, I might even reject it fully. Nobody tricks me.
•Your character must not be an unserious one. I don't want to review Cursed Seal Luxvan because I'd be biased.
•If you get a negative rate, I won't review any of your characters for a month.
•If you get 3 characters in a row with a rate below 5, I won't review any of your characters for one week. Additionally, each negative rate raises your ban for one by one month each time. Getting a rate over 5 will nullify it. That's what the "(-)" means.
•If you post hunted on any of my topics, I won't review for you. And trust me, I hold a deep grudge against post hunters. (Exception for people that actually reviewed my shit and posted only to annoy me back then)
•You can only request one character from me at a time and only once. I will consider it a new character if you fully rework at least two skills.
•I still have the right to decline to review your character whenever I want to. Because I don't want to.

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Review System:

Design - 2

Grammar (-?):
~/~

Description: For each grammar mistake you have I will decrease 0.2 of the rate. For each odd spelling that occurs to me I will decrease 0.1 from the original rate.

Pictures (?/1):
~/~

Description: It strictly depends on my preferences. On short I am most strict with Face Pictures and fashion effects on animation pictures and/or movie pictures. Each picture I like equals +0.2.

Template (?/0.5):
~/~

Description: This was put here, along with the Description, so you'd have a 1/10 from the beginning. Anyway, even these you may mess up, so yeah. Template wise, I will mostly look at how appealing or how far from the original it is. Better pray you are not using MasterOfTheChars or Luxvan's old templates.

Character Description (?/0.5):
~/~

Description's Description: As said, this is here for the 1/10 along with template. I will give no points if the description is like this and I am actually quoting a description: "This is Tsuchikage." GJ, NO POINTS FOR YOU! Also, I might decrease for how informative or how much useless information it has.

Skillset - 8

Balance (?/2):
~/~

Description: Keep in mind, this measures the overall balance, not the balance of a single skill. You may have all skills unbalanced by a little and have a 1.75/2 or an instakilling skill for no costs and cooldowns and a 0/2.

Flow (?/1):
~/~

Description: How well the skills synergize between each other. If you know what flow is, you probably can guess yourself how I point this section.

Concept (?/1.5):
~/~

Description: It's basically how the skills work towards a settled goal. A common effect or a build up towards something amazing. A simple concept would be the one of Niiro Jun. He stacks up charges of his 3rd skill through his first skill which targets a random enemy and deals some damage. Each charge increases the damage of his 3rd skill that pierces and leave a massive impact on the character, even kill him depending on charges. Then they reset, and there you go again. It's a basic concept and it'd get a 0.75. I want something more complex.

Originality (?/2):
~/~

Description: This is mostly experience driven. If I've never seen a character made that way, full score. If it's totally not uncommon, then 0.

Technicalities/Mistakes (?/1.5):
~/~

Description: This can be summarized as bad classes and bad conditionals on skills or formulation. It basically is what wouldn't work correctly.

Unpleasantries (?):
~/~

Description: Anything I dislike about a certain part of your character that doesn't qualify to the other things? -0.25 points

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Example of a review:

d2Hb5RL.png

Design - 1,3-1=0,3. (The design is ok, but your grammar ruined you)

Grammar (-1):
You mispelled formerly in the description as formely. (-0,2)
That sentence should end at "Kenpachi" or at least have a comma, of course, removing the apostrophes. (-0,2)
Recklesly attacking whom? It should be mentioned. And that no mercy afterwards isn't needed. (-0,2)
Also in the third skill, you should add a "'s" to the second "Unohana". (-0,2)
I think you should reformulate the last sentence of the description. It just sounds weird and it is really hard to understand. You could say she is the best at Kaido. (-0,1)
You should say the foes in the third skill for the first foes. The lack of that word just sounds weird. Never place the with a comma. (-0,1)


Pictures (0,6/1):
I am okay with manga fashion pictures, since they have no colors at all.
I dislike the face picture since it looks straight to the "camera". It's a bad stock for me. (-0,1)
The second skill picture doesn't really show how she regenerated. It shows a scar. (-0,1)
The fourth skill picture... It's unclear what there even is. (-0,2)

Template (0.5/0.5):
A basic ok template. Carry on.

Description (0,2/0.5):
You have some erronated information in the description. A Kenpachi is a title given to the strongest Shinigami. Period. (-0,05)
You should add more information about her fighting abilities instead of her personality. All you said is that she is a reckless fighter and good at healing kidous. Explain her Shikai and Bankai if you mentioned them. (-0,25)

Skillset - 5.75-0.25=5.5 (Definitely better than the average skillset, good, if not very good)

Balance (1.75/2):
I think that the first skill with no influence from the others is underpowered due to the fact it has a very long cooldown for what it does. Anyway, due to the third skill, the skill is only underpowered because it can't be used whenever inactive. The Bankai skill is well justified and shouldn't really influence the cost and cooldown of the first skill. Yes, it makes it pretty impactful, but you'd have to use the skill again for it to work that way. And chances are that it was probably already active at that moment. The second skill is ok. A bit over the top, but only by a nanometer so it's forgiven.

Flow (0,75/1):
Well, the flow is good. It's not perfect, since second skill isn't influenced by anything in the character, but everything else synergizes. And second skill helps in synergizing too.

Concept (1.25/1.5):
She has two paths. A less offensive path that doesn't deal much damage, but it's easier to get charges of 3rd skill. And one that is definitely faster but you can't systematically decimate your opponent. Her concept is destructive force, but she also has a bit of purification. I would've liked if there was some way to keep the purification going during 4th skill, but it probably present more balance issues with her current skillset. So the concept is ok. Almost perfect.

Originality (1/2):
How many character have you seen that heal the opponent in order to deal damage through charges? I didn't see many, if any. And I also haven't seen a bankai skill executed that way before. It's very nice. Beyond nice actually. It's an original character, but it still uses a new common things I see in characters. That doesn't make it bad thought.

Technicalities/Mistakes (1.25/1.5):
Not really anything that I haven't noted somewhere else, but there is still something to mention. The fourth skill doesn't really specify if the first skill suddenly gets the improvement, even if active. I will just assume that it doesn't. Technicality, but it matters.

Unpleasantries (-0,25):
Destroying a foe endlessly? This description doesn't really fit what the skill does. Recklessly attacking with her shikai would do better. (-0,25)

Overall: 5.8/10 (Your grammar underrates you. Work on those mistakes)

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Favoritism Shop:

For each character that got more than 5, even by a few 0.1 points, you will get a favoritism point. With these you can buy favors from me. Also if you reviewed my character on the Boutique. To use them you have to request a review solely from me and add this to the entry form: "Favoritism:". You will add the name of the favor and a x? how many times you will use that favor for this character. If your character is below 5, it will get a negative point. I will list the current favors available here:

~Additional Lines~ - You are allowed to use an additional line to one skill rather than the maximum allowed. Adding x? will let you add even more additional lines. Cost: 2 Points.
~Additional Lines -Whole Skillset- ~ - You are allowed to use an additional line for all skils rather than the maximum allowed. Adding x? will let you add even more additional lines. Cost: 4 Points.
~Additional Skill~ - You are allowed to add an additional skill rather than the maximum allowed. Adding x? will let you add even more additional skills. Cost: 6 Points.
~Index~ - You are allowed to add an index where you can list skill effects.
Something like this but the maximum it can have is 8 lines. x? allows you that many more lines. Costs: 10 points.
~Rush Hour~ - Your character gets priority over everybody's.. x? allows you higher priority over others.

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Favoritism Points:

~Firebane: 3
~Suraj_Anton (-)(-)
~pursin (-)
~stormyskills (-)
~Rasengan_89: -1
~Pain_Alagoano: -1 (-)
~TediMoci: 1
~ULQUIORRA_J: -1
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Two in a row danger:

~//~

Characters of whom I won't read for a while:

  Posted on September 29, 2013 11:49
Fennekin
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
Licker

Posts: 1111
Joined on:
February 7, 2013
#3
O B L I G A T O R Y I N T R O T E X T
the letters are spaced out to make it look like i have some sort of design.
shut up september is anti-bully month.

Oh, and hello. I’m Luvixi (not Luxivi), previously known as Luxvan but still known as Lux. Though my collection of characters is fairly average, I’ve been known to give detailed and helpful cnc’s to anyone that needs them… until I realize that I should really stop using N-B so much, that is.
And just for the record, Fennekin’s one of my many alternate accounts. I’m using this here because Zank needed to post this when I was unavailable.

Let’s just cut to the chase.

1. The only requirement for posting a character is that you must link a song you like in your post. It doesn't matter which one, just share your musical tastes with me. I'm interested. And I shit you not, I will ignore all posts that don't have a song linked to them.
2. I have the personal right to refuse any character you submit, and at times I may just get lazy and not work on them. I’m kind of a dick, but not like Zank. (grumpy)
3. Don’t rush me. This shit takes time that I can spend pretending to do other things.
4. So I don’t end up being overworked by anyone, you can only post one character per day, and three characters per week. That doesn’t mean I’ll only do this amount total, it’s just per person. I may end up restricting total amounts, though, if I get enough requests >.>
5. Doesn’t matter which character you post, whether it was made 5 minutes ago or 5 years ago. Just don’t post parodies because I know they’re not serious.
6. I swear often and I make jokes... don't be offended or bothered by anything is all, and don't take anything personally.
7. If you refer to me as "Luxivi," I will not cnc your character until you correct yourself.
8. To save myself some trouble, I won't review your character if you ask for all workers. I'm confident that the others will give sufficient feedback.

How I make my CnC’s:
I will divide the cnc into three paragraphs. The first paragraph will be labeled as SYNOPSIS, which is where I will describe the character in a simplistic form to demonstrate my understanding of the character, in case I mess something up. The second paragraph is REVIEW, which is exactly what you think it will be. I will give the actual feedback of the character here. Typically, I will review each individual skill (while sometimes bringing in other skills into the comments) and then review the character as a whole. The third paragraph is the CLOSING, which is just a small summary of the review. Last but not least is the score…

The number scale is “quarterly” (if that’s the right term), meaning that there’s x.0, x.25, x.5, and x.75.

Appearance = 1 point.
The eye-candy of the character. The skills, the template, grammar, any sort of design that the character has that doesn’t involve skills. If you used pictures from someone else, you will not get the full points for this.

Design = 2 points.
Does the character have a specific idea or purpose, or is it just 4 skills thrown together? The overall design of the character is graded here, along with the complexity or originality of it.

Skills = 2 points.
This goes about the skills individually, and it’s easy to say that each skill is worth half a point, but not necessarily. Anyway, this judges how the skills flow into the character, how creative they are, etc.

Balance = 2 points.
Um, if you need an explanation of this, expect a mediocre rate.

Overall = 3 points.
While it might not necessarily be an average score, it’s based on the character as a whole, depending on how the character appeals or is executed, it’s good and bad points, and maybe even if it’s a step backwards or forwards for the maker.

For my personal pleasure (ha, I just said pleasure), I have the meaning of the numbers here.
10 = PERFECT. PUNKING INTENSIFIES. IT’S HAPPENING. The character appeals easily and has absolutely no issues whatsoever, not even minor ones. I'll post a .gif in your honor.
9 = Excellent. While not perfect, you’ve still created something with a very high rate of appeal. The only flaws in the character are probably minor ones or debatable ones; should they be addressed, the character might become perfect.
8 = Good. That’s a pretty cool character, bro. But let me get my buddy that’s an expert on cool characters. The character has some negatives, but they shouldn’t be looked at more than the positives. The character is good and respectable.
7 = Solid. There are still positives to outshine the negatives, but there are still quite a few negatives to be addressed. If you’re experienced, this was probably made on an off-day. If you’re inexperienced, this is actually a solid rate to shoot for since it’s expected of you to make mistakes.
6 = Decent. I often see characters with broken concepts into this area. It’s bubbling around average, consider either improving or forgetting that this character exists.
5 = Average. A middling rate. As average as a character can get. It’s either highly flawed in concept, or a basic character that many others can easily create.
4 = Negative. The character probably doesn’t gain its problems from one factor, but several factors at once. However, they might not be too serious and instead be too numerous.
3 = Poor. There are many issues that are annoying and frustrating and need a good amount of reconstruction. It’s likely that I’ll propose a rework idea for a skill or two in a character around here because it’s gonna need one.
2 = Bad. Practically broken. It’s not just a character with weak ideas, the ideas simply don’t work, and the character is an all-around mess.
1 = Dreadful. If you didn’t get your only point from Appearance, everything about the character is bad. There’s little good to be seen in it.
0 = No. Just no. Please don’t ever make another character ever again, or I will come into your house while you sleep, eat all the good shit out of your fridge, and flush a pad down your toilet.

• I won't review any of Luvixi’s characters until 9.30.2023.

I’d also like to point out that this system may be revamped later on. Since I haven’t done any cnc’s recently, I need to refresh myself about the weaknesses and inconsistencies I saw in this system.

I will also showcase the best character of each week here. Typically, it will be the character with the highest rating, but it could also rely on the comments themselves instead of the rate.

This post was also shortened so that you wouldn’t yawn so much. If you want more details and examples, visit Cookies 'n Cream, an earlier version of this topic, located here.
  Posted on September 29, 2013 11:55
KaanKashi
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
Licker

Posts: 1875
Joined on:
June 19, 2012
#4
It's finally up!
Character: Puq1byX.png
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Zank
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: One
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Side Notes Regarding The Character: None
Were You Satisfied With Your Previous Review From This Person: IDK
Custom character showcase Custom character pictures
1Ie8by9.gif?1 JFE8j7L.png
Thanks to Sorina-Hokage for my avatar.
  Posted on September 29, 2013 13:18
Suraj_Anton
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
Licker

Posts: 1587
Joined on:
October 23, 2012
#5
Here we go

Character: Third Hokage
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: sasuke1vs1naruto
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: 1
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
  Posted on September 29, 2013 13:54
lewis1999
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
Licker

Posts: 2951
Joined on:
January 22, 2009
#6
Get Lucky

Character:
PoBWXVt.png

Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Luvixi
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: Just the 1
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Side Notes Regarding The Character: (Optional): It probably sucks
Were You Satisfied With Your Previous Review From This Person: Yes (Old cnc topic)
  Posted on September 29, 2013 14:41
sasuke1vs1naruto
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
U Wat M8

Posts: 12016
Joined on:
November 25, 2008
#7
Suraj_Anton wrote:
Here we go

Character: Third Hokage
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: sasuke1vs1naruto
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: 1
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Design - 0.95 - 2.1 = -1.15

Grammar (-2.1):
Either remove the "the" from "even in the dangerous time" or remove the "in the" from that structure and replace it with during. (-0,2)
You should add an s to the word "time" that was mention above. (-0,2)
Why is Ninjas capitalized in first skill? It shouldn't be. (-0.1)
Add a "to" before "attack his enemies". (-0,2)
Rever the enemy with affliction in the first skill. (-0,2)
Saying "enemy affliction damaging skill" would be better. Many skills that don't deal damage are arguably attacks. (-0.1)
Add an "s" to the skill from the structure "all enemy skill" from the second skill. (-0.2)
In the fourth skill instead of "is" from the structure "that skill is reversed" use will be. Also remove "that skill" from that structure. Not needed. (-0.4)
For the structure afterwards just replace it fully with "target themselves next turn". (-0.4)
It'd be better if you said that "Relax cannot be used while this is active." instead of your current last sentence. You mentioned it's duration in the first sentence so it might confuse people. (-0.1)

Pictures (0.6/1):
I dislike the cropping of the face picture since his face isn't in the center. (-0.1)
I think the 4th picture needs a bit more sharpening. (-0.1)
The third picture meases a border line and has a double border on the left. (-0.2)

Template (0.25/0.5):
As you have squished up text and skill that gets out of skill boxes: -0.25
Check unpleasantries next, okay?

Description (0.1/0.5):
Your description raises a lot of questions. What is a Hokage? What is his capabilities? Yeah... It's not informative. You will get 0.1 points because you said a little about him that arguably matters.

Skillset - 1.75 - 10 = -8.25

Balance (0/2):
Since you are missing an important class for third skill, I can't determine the balance of the character. A class, even a single one, is a very important detail which should never be forgoten. It's a huge shame to be forgoten and that class, depending on the skillset, could disprove or approve the balance of a character.

Flow (0.25/1):
There is a slight link between the first and second skill. That's all. That's all the flow.

Concept (0/1.5):
No concept whatsoever.

Originality (0.5/2):
The fourth skill has an original idea. I haven't seen a skill to reflect counters as well as increase their duration. It's creative... Not too special tho. And that's the only special thing from this character.

Technicalities/Mistakes (1/1.5):
You are missing a timebound class. That class matters a lot for the way the skill would behave in-game. (-0.5)


Unpleasantries (-10):
For each line that gets out of the text box, I will decrease 0,25 points from the rate. Let's count them. 1,2... 14! (-14 x 0.25= -3,5)
For each space that hasn't been left for between each punctuation marks and character after them. Same rule. -0.25. Let's count them too. 1,2...16! (-16 x 0,25 = -4)
The Third Hokage isn't a telepath. Don't turn him into a fucking pokemon. (-0,25)
Why would you create a skill called Relax in a game that has "Arena" in it? (-0,25)
In the first skill you said "He gains 20 damage reduction." Who is this "he"? I've assumed it's Hiruzen. It's okay to say after one sentence in which you mentioned the person's name "he", but after 2 or 3 it just gets confusing. You have this problem all over the character. Let's count the he, him and himself's that are out of order. 1,2.. 8. (-8 x 0.25 = -2)

Overall: -9.40/10

Congratulations. Almost a perfect 10. The only bad thing here is that it would've been negative. Try harder next time. I will let you train until 29.10.2013, since you got a negative rate.

I won't review any of Suraj_Anton's character until 29.10.2013.
  Posted on September 29, 2013 14:54
godbot
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
Licker

Posts: 2666
Joined on:
August 12, 2008
#8
Character: Hi.
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Zank
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: Just Zank
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Side Notes Regarding The Character: While the first skill can go above 50% when the third skill is used, the passive can't.
Were You Satisfied With Your Previous Review From This Person: Never Tried Them Yet.
|| CC showcase. ~ || ~ Join Asylum! ~ || ~ Asy chat. ~ || ~ Asylum thread ~ ||~ Retired. For now. ~ ||

q4yHnLX.png

|| "The moon will rise. The night will last forever." ~ || ~ Thanks to Ashelia from Reddit for the signature.
  Posted on September 29, 2013 16:26
sasuke1vs1naruto
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
U Wat M8

Posts: 12016
Joined on:
November 25, 2008
#9
godbot wrote:
Character: Hi.
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Zank
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: Just Zank
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Side Notes Regarding The Character: While the first skill can go above 50% when the third skill is used, the passive can't.
Were You Satisfied With Your Previous Review From This Person: Never Tried Them Yet.
Design - 1.5 - 1 = 0.5

Grammar (-1):
In the first sentence "Light Yagami is the top student in his country.", replace the "the" with "a". (-0.2)
There is no need for the comma in the mission after the nerd. (-0.2)
You wrote another as an other in the second skill. (-0,2)
Since you've enumerated effects in the third skill, you should've used an "and" for the first sentence. (-0,2)
You mispelled unpierceable in 4th skill. (-0,2)

Pictures (0.7/1):
I dislike the face picture. He doesn't look straight forward and the focus of the face is just wrong. And besides that, I think it should be zoomed in more. (-0.1)
I think the first and third skill pictures need slightly more sharpening and contrast. (-0.2)

Template (0.35/0.5):
You have a small white gap in the description where the gray "matter" is. (-0,05)
You have squished up text. (-0.1)

Description (0.45/0.5):
A bit of an erronated information. He doesn't try to recreate the world. He tries to remodel the order of the world. He can't recreate the world. He can just kill it. (-0.05)

Skillset - 5 - 5.75 = -0.75

Balance (0/2):
So I've calculated. In order to solely kill an opponent, the first skill has to last 14 turns. On it's own. I bet you couldn't tell me that. That makes the skill really underpowered in my eyes. Make it cost nothing. AND THAT'S THE ONLY THING YOU CAN DO! In my opinion, 2nd skill is even more useless. Just let Light affect everyone with first skill and add something else to second skill. The third skill's improvement is also very very very slow, so it isn't really helpful. This character does virtually nothing besides being protected by an unpierceable PERCENTAGE reduction that can be stunned to be gotten rid of. Underpowered.

Flow (1/1):
Most skills link with each other either directly or indirectly. It's all good here, in this department.

Concept (1.5/1.5):
His concept centers around percentages. While being really annoying to calculate, it was executed correctly. It lacks balance still, but it was executed perfectly.

Originality (1/2):
Well, the parallel reduction is very original, as well as the fact that a skill that can't be used while active can be used through another skill. The other skills are kinda plain.

Technicalities/Mistakes (1.5/1.5):
Most of them are at unpleasantries.

Unpleasantries (-5.75):
Why would he misuse the death note? Explain that better.(-0,25)
For each percentage in the character I will decrease 0.25. (-21 x 0.25 = -5.25 ) - I've calculated exactly how many percentages can be reached through first skill. The maximum number.
Ryuk never has written the name of another person freely in the Death Note. That's flawed logic right there. (-0,25)

Overall: -0.25/10

Since it is so close to 0, I will not ban you for a month. I will ban you for a week. Pleased?
  Posted on September 29, 2013 16:37
akatorochimaru
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
Licker

Posts: 1767
Joined on:
July 21, 2007
#10
Character: Naruto Uzumaki
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Zank
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: 1
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
CklMBGk.png
  Posted on September 29, 2013 17:07
Rasengan_89
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
N-A Illuminati

Posts: 5373
Joined on:
March 1, 2008
#11
Character: This one, tsk
For LUX: I know only this one
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Zank & Lux
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: Zank & Lux
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Side Notes Regarding The Character: Pics are colored manga, so dont penalyze me a lot for that. Also, #YOLO, I want 2 negative results lol
ALSO, be realist with the possible in-game situation, do not go extremely far with the possible teams this character may face .__.
Were You Satisfied With Your Previous Review From This Person: Idk.

EDIT
@SVN: In the description a word is missing, its "version' of Yin Yang Release Chakra, my bad :D
Also, I thought it was clear, there is no direct flow, but each skill helps the other to be improved :V
TIS OK
@LUX: about the passive, I'm going to take the ignore skill as an option I might apply, about the first skill I might add 1 turn cd.
Again, my concept for him is to make the opponent find a good way to kill him, to stress him, in few words the concept of this character is DURABILITY.
Anyway thanks both
r4I12s3.png erk5Vet.png
All my characters will go under rework (slowly) ~ Best Improved CC Maker in 2013! ~ OMG IT'S OVER 25 THOUSAND views, thanks a lot! ~ Winner of the Official Staff Tournament: Fading Moonlight #5 ~
MitiS is HERE
  Posted on September 29, 2013 17:58
sasuke1vs1naruto
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
U Wat M8

Posts: 12016
Joined on:
November 25, 2008
#12
akatorochimaru wrote:
Character: Naruto Uzumaki
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Zank
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: 1
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Design - 1.15 - 1.6 = -0.45

Grammar (-1.6):
You should've written the "tailed fox" from the description like this: Tailed Fox. At that point in the anime, that was it's name. (-0.2)
You should also write apart as a part. Apart means something totally different. (-0.2)
In the last sentence of the description, after the Naruto, you should add an " 's ". (-0.2)
There is no need for the "the" before Hokage. (-0.1)
Before "acknowledges" in the last sentence should be a "would" and it should not have an "s". (-0.4)
You haven't capitalized a "n" from naruto in first skill. (-0.1)
In the third skill you mispelled beneficial as "benificial". (-0.2)

Pictures (0.55/1):
They have a tint of red which I dislike. The pictures look ok, but the tint of red is just not for me. (-0.25)
I dislike the face picture. Period. He should look straight forward not to the right. (-0.1)
I dislike the third picture. The quality of Naruto in that picture looks slightly oversharpened. (-0.1)

Template (0.5/0.5):
Basic template. Nothing wrong with it.

Description (0.1/0.5):
Not really informative. It doesn't give any information about Naruto's fighting capabilities and it raises more questions. What's a Jinchuuriki? Or a Hidden Leaf Genin? The Hokage. I will give 0.1 because the description is there.

Skillset - 2 -1.75 = 0.25

Balance (0/2):
Because I don't know what true defense is, I can't determine the balance of the character. It may mean that the character would take 1 damage from any skill used. It could mean something else.

Flow (0.5/1):
Well, they link together, but the flow isn't perfect by far.

Concept (0.5/1.5):
It seems like just the beginning, but it really doesn't focus at all around something. They are just some improvement. Should I count the concept as random improvements? That would be just silly, sorry. I will still count the try.

Originality (0/2):
None.

Technicalities/Mistakes (1/1.5):
There is no way that the third skill can keep track of how many times the character has been stunned. you should've made a manual one.

Unpleasantries (-1.75):
He gains 1 clone? What's a clone? For each mention clone you will have decreased 0.25. (-6 * 0.25 = -1.5)
What's true defense? (-0.25)

Overall: -0.20

The same as Godbot. For one week, I won't review any of your characters. That is 07.09.2013 at the moment.
Rasengan_89 wrote:
Character: This one, tsk
For LUX: I know only this one
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Zank & Lux
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: Zank & Lux
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Side Notes Regarding The Character: Pics are colored manga, so dont penalyze me a lot for that. Also, #YOLO, I want 2 negative results lol
ALSO, be realist with the possible in-game situation, do not go extremely far with the possible teams this character may face .__.
Were You Satisfied With Your Previous Review From This Person: Idk.
Design - 0.8 - 1.4 = -0.6

Grammar (-1.4):
Undergoing crazy is incorrect. Undergoing has a meaning similar to enduring. Unless you mean physicalized madness, such as things from Soul Eater, it's incorrect. Going crazy is correct. (-0.1)
You should capitalize the "U" in uchiha in the description. (-0.1)
"He gained the control of a unique and powerful of Yin-Yang Chakra Release chakra, which he can modifies for both defensive and offensive purposes." - Rework this sentence. I told you already that your grammar sucks. (-0.6) "He gained the control of an unique type of chakra, the Yin-Yang Release, which he uses for both offensive and defensive purposes." How does this sound?
Who's this "his" in first skill? I assume it's the opponent, in which case, it should be theirs. (-0.2)
On the third skill, you should have added an "s" to summon. (-0.2)
Also its* instead of his final form. (-0.2)


Pictures (0.6/1):
I dislike the stock of the face picture as well as it's quality and coloring. (-0.2)
The fourth picture seems rather blurry. (-0.1)
The first is slightly oversharpened. (-0.1)

Template (0.1/0.5):
It's altered in a really bad way. The shuriken is bigger, but of a lesser quality and fonts plainly suck, not to mention they are badly placed.

Description (0.1/0.5):
What's the Ten Tails? What's the Sage of the Six Paths? What's the Yin-Yang Release? How does it manifest? Not informative. And using it in offensive and defensive ways doesn't really help much.

Skillset - 1.5 - 0.25 = 1.25

Balance (0/2):
If there is a team that can deal solely mental and physical damage, not chakra, it's gg easy for this character. It's too OP. Nerf it.

Flow (0/1):
No skill is being linked to each other at all.

Concept (0/1.5):
The only common thing between each other is the can't be denied by any means. THat is not a concept.

Originality (0/2):
Fourth skill would've been original if you wouldn't have made a skill very similar to that one before.

Technicalities/Mistakes (1.5/1.5):
Nothing I didn't take note of already.

Unpleasantries (-0.25):
I dislike the fact that first skill halves damage. That might result in a oddity. (-0.25)

0.65/10
Mental+Physical is possible. Sorry you couldn't take the negative rate.
  Posted on September 29, 2013 19:22
Luvixi
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
N-A Illuminati

Posts: 4228
Joined on:
February 12, 2013
#13
Character: SOOO ZETTA SLOW
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Zank and obviously Luvixi
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: 2
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Were You Satisfied With Your Previous Review From This Person: Yes

btw i like daft punk too
x[]o Inactive account that's only used to update my showcase. Now using Fennekin as my main account.
  Posted on September 29, 2013 19:42
roia
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
Licker

Posts: 2737
Joined on:
January 19, 2009
#14
Do I really need intro text? Well I guess I am sort of an asshole, but not as much of a dick as Zank when cncing, mainly because I don't harp that much on unpleasantries unless they create technical or balance issues. Although I am far more of a dick than Lux. Also I <3 Teddiursa and Pancham, that is all o.o

#MahRulesBitch:
1. Use the form, obviously.
2. If you bitch and complain about a cnc with no legitimate point more than once I won't cnc for you anymore.
3. If you say that a character that is underpowered and overpowered in two different skills is balanced I won't cnc for you anymore.
4. You must love me <3, except for Zank. He refuses to love me.
5. I also require you to post a philosophy quote with your form for me to cnc for you. Don't reuse either. If I don't like the quote I may make you find a new one :3
6. Any characters with more than 8 skills may be cnc'ed or not, depending on my laziness level that day.
7. If another worker requests me they must provide another thing for me. They must provide a good math joke. No reusing them either!


CnC'ing Rules For Me:
No Rates below 0/10. If I give a rate below 0/10 I'm probably emphasizing how bad it was. In which case you should just stop making characters.
Each cnc starts with 0 points and must earn them as I go through the cnc system of mine.
No bias for people I like or dislike.
Don't rate any joke characters (Jokes characters being ones with an obvious disregard for balance and only made to be funny)

CnC'ing System:

Design - 2 points
-Flow (1/1)
[How well the skills work together in the same concept, if there isn't any flowing between skills you will get no points]
-Usability (0.5/0.5)
[How usable and useful it would be in an actual game, if it's not able to be very usable or useful you will get no points]
-Overall Concept (0.5/0.5)
[Grades the overall concept of the skills as a whole, if there isn't an overrall concept you will get no points]

Presentation - 2 points
-Pictures (1/1)
[This scores your pictures. You will get no points if the pictures are too bad or if they aren't your own]
-Grammar/Spelling (0.5/0.5)
[This scores your grammar and spelling, as well as the text used in the character as a whole. If there are too many issues you will get no points]
-Template (0.5/0.5)
[This scores the template you use. It deals with like picture borders, template fonts, your energy system, and any other things that are part of the template]

Skills - 6 points
-Balance (3.5/3.5)
[How balance your skills are as a whole. If your character is underpowered or overpowered or just too weirdly balanced you will get no points. PS: Having one underpowered and one overpowered skill DOES NOT make your character balanced, and if you say it does I will not cnc one of your characters again. Seriously it's in my rules]
-Creativity (1.5/1.5)
[This is scored based on how innovative, entertaining, or complex your character is. If it is too complex for me to understand or follow quickly in a battle you will get no points. If it is as basic as some of the N-A characters you will get no points. Being boring won't get a 0 in this section, but could lower your score if the other two parts aren't quite up to par]
-Classes/Functionality (1/1)
[This score is based on the classes you used and the functionality of the skills. The functionality basically refers to issues with how the skill works, like if there is a contradiction in how it works. If the issue is big enough you will also lose points in usability, balance, overall concept, flow, and possibly other areas depending how severe the issue]

Personal Style - No points, but I'll try and touch on your personal style and possible issues that could arise. If one of these is in another section then I'll try to expand on it here, if I'm too swamped I might not touch on this as much I would if I had less requests going at a time.
-Wording
-Pictures
-Template (Will definitely be used for expanding on the template for people who use custom templates)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

DXONx1F.png
(Dasake's Sexy White Zetsu)

Design - 2 points
-Flow (0.75/1)
[The flow is good, but it could be better. You coudl incorporate the 3rd skill better, or you could have made these points up if the 4th skill flowed and wasn't just an invul skill]
-Usability (0.25/0.5)
[The character is usable in-game, but not as much as it could be due to the ninjutsu chakra overload. The no cooldowns make him very usable in that regard though]
-Overall Concept (0.4/0.5)
[The concept of basing his effects off of the enemy's skill usage is a good idea, but could have been incorporated better into some skills, such as the 3rd or 4th]

Presentation - 2 points
-Pictures (0.9/1)
[They're good, just need a little tweaking because the 1st looks a little blurry and the 2nd looks like it could use a tad bit more color.]
-Grammar/Spelling (0.3/0.5)
[There are only see 2 issues I see, "with out" in the description should be "without" and "which is very easy to him" in the description should be "which is very easy for him".]
-Template (0.5/0.5)
[It's a nice template, the bottom is just a little clunky for me, but that doesn't really matter for the score.]

Skills - 6 points
-Balance (3/3.5)
[The balance is good overall, but the Parasitic Decoding skill seems a tad underpowered. I would suggest you reduce the cost to one ninjutsu and one random then add that a one turn cooldown activates after the skill it's replaced with is used.]
-Creativity (1.25/1.5)
[It's not unoriginal, nor is it common. But it isn't exactly super creative. It could do with just a bit more creativity.]
-Classes/Functionality (1/1)
[Your classes work well and there are no functionality issues with him.]

Personal Style - No points, but I'll try and touch on your personal style and possible issues that could arise. If one of these is in another section then I'll try to expand on it here, if I'm too swamped I might not touch on this as much I would if I had less requests going at a time.
-Wording (The wording is fine. It seems professional, just a few grammar issues.)
-Pictures (The face picture looks good, maybe just the taddest bit of level increasing. The Spore Technique picture looks a tad bit blurry compared to the others. The Parasitic Decoding picture looks a little bland, maybe some more saturation or a level increase would work? Absorption is good, just a tad off center. Parasitic Clone is fine. Overall you should use a little more of the levels and a tad more saturation couldn't hurt. Also look out for making the pics look about the same sharpness.)
-Template (The template is nice, however I wish there was a little bit of padding below the 3rd and 4th skill boxes with some more black.)

Overall Score: 8.35/10 (Pretty good, but could be quite a bit better.)

yc3mZJW.png
(Lux's not very sexy Drunken Fist Lee)

Design - 2 points
-Flow (0/1)
[The flow is pretty bad, he's all over the place. Not much going on between skills that even resembles flow.]
-Usability (0.5/0.5)
[He's usable and wouldn't be very difficult to use in a battle.]
-Overall Concept (0.05/0.5)
[The concept is basically damage and a basis on the attack range class, which isn't a solid concept at all.]

Presentation - 2 points
-Pictures (1/1)
[Pictures are alright, maybe a tad oversharpened but for these points they're fine.]
-Grammar/Spelling (0.4/0.5)
[Spelling Mistake! Defensive Wha-pow!: "importants", no just no.]
-Template (0.4/0.5)
[The template's fine, but the right side needs a little padding, it seems lopsided since there isn't any padding on the right and the left has the chakra thing there.]

Skills - 6 points
-Balance (1.5/3.5)
[Aerial Wha-pow! is a tad overpowered. I suggest a 1 turn cooldown. I don't think Wha-Pow! needs a cooldown since it uses two tai ... and two of the same specific always seems to be harder to get than two different specifics. Beer is overpowered as a passive. Remove the last effect and change the dr of the second effect to 25% for it to be a decent passive.]
-Creativity (0.5/1.5)
[Not creative at all, but you get a few points for doing passives. Not many people do them really, or as well as you did ... which is sad.]
-Classes/Functionality (0.5/1)
[He's functional and everything. Your classes are fine, but I feel like taking some classes and labeling them subclasses isn't necessary. Just lump all the classes together if you're going to do that.]

Personal Style - No points, but I'll try and touch on your personal style and possible issues that could arise. If one of these is in another section then I'll try to expand on it here, if I'm too swamped I might not touch on this as much I would if I had less requests going at a time.
-Wording (It's not as joking as your newer stuff, but it's still pretty informal and rather funny, while still being able to be understood.)
-Pictures (The pictures are fine, a couple are just the taddest bit oversharpened for my taste.)
-Template (This template, my issues were with the lack of padding on the right side and the subclasses. But the blue lines are kind of irritating for a color in my opinion.)

Overall Rate: 4.8/10 (Not good, but might be salvagable. You would be better just to scrap this idea and make a new one though.)

ZabuzaET_zps547d36bb.png
(R_Starks' unsexy Edo Tensei Zabuza)

Design - 2 points
-Flow (0/1)
[You tried to make it flow, but used different concepts between different skills. Only 2 skills overlap at a time with a concept. Therfore you get no points.]
-Usability (0.25/0.5)
[He's usable for the game, but would not be any sort of fun to play with.]
-Overall Concept (0.5/0.5)
[There isn't a real overall concept, just smaller concepts.]

Presentation - 2 points
-Pictures (0/1)
[The pictures aren't yours, they are Radarobert's, so you get 0 points for this.]
-Grammar/Spelling (0.5/0.5)
[Just read through it and find your mistakes, there are too many for me to take the time to point out each one.]
-Template (0/0.5)
[Where is the classes section for the passive? What is that weird dot at the top of the template? What are those orange and dark blue chakras? What is that line thing on the border of the 2nd skill near the cooldown? These are all template issues, so no points for this.]

Skills - 6 points
-Balance (1/3.5)
[Hidden Mist is actually pretty underpowered since it is a partial invulnerability. It doesn't actually need a cooldown at all, however if you feel that it needs one then make the cooldown 1. Great Sword Cleaver is underpowered. It should deal at least 15 piercing damage. Bloody Reforgement is very underpowered, it should have like no cost at all or the DR should last for like 3 turns. The passive is fine balance-wise ... kind of. It could do more for him. Like not have to have him be below 35 health to be active.]
-Creativity (0.5/1.5)
[So yeah, there's nearly no creativity here. The only creative element besides using a passive (an underpowered one at that) is the 3rd skill's effect to make each skill used by the enemy be reclassified as chakra.]
-Classes/Functionality (0.75/1)
[The passive skill doesn't have any classes, and it should. Passives should still have classes, because some can be stunned and have other class-specific effects like that affect them.]

Personal Style - No points, but I'll try and touch on your personal style and possible issues that could arise. If one of these is in another section then I'll try to expand on it here, if I'm too swamped I might not touch on this as much I would if I had less requests going at a time.
-Wording (The wording is very short, too short. It's a little hard to know if you spent more than 10 minutes on this character because of how little you have in the skills and description boxes.)
-Pictures (The pictures have none of your own style because they are Radarobert's ... good going starks. You completely neglected one of the things that a character maker should be able to do, make pictures for their characters.)
-Template (I already touched on these issues in the Presentation section. Those are all of my template issues really.)

Overall Rate: 3.5/10 (A generous rate. I get more generous the lower the score gets. You should probably feel bad about that and just start reading every good tutorial you can about balance and flow again and again until you understand. Then you might be ready to try and gain some more experience. Only then should you start making more characters, and you shouldn't consider yourself good until you look at what you started with and see that it is absolutely awful.)
Kisuke Urahara is God himself! | My Character Showcase | Yaoi Characters Are Hot
tumblr_lqrwybjcg61qed5s0o1_500.gif
Cosine is a pedophile, always touching your angle! Such a Sexy Song! #PanchamIsEpic
  Posted on September 30, 2013 05:11
Luvixi
Rank: member

Forum Rank:
N-A Illuminati

Posts: 4228
Joined on:
February 12, 2013
#15
HAHA. THEY’RE LINKING DAFT PUNK SONGS. SEE ZANK, I’M SO AMUSED RIGHT NOW. BEST IDEA EVER.
lewis1999 wrote:
Get Lucky

Character:
PoBWXVt.png

Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Luvixi
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: Just the 1
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Side Notes Regarding The Character: (Optional): It probably sucks
Were You Satisfied With Your Previous Review From This Person: Yes (Old cnc topic)
lol basic bitch you linked get lucky (turkey)

SYNOPSIS: First skill is a massive spike that also reduces some of their damages. Second skill is a minor damaging skill that has a psudo-defense, forcing the enemy to back the fuck off for a turn, and it can negate their invulnerability for a turn or two. Third skill boosts the first skill’s damage and um… stuns the most recently used skill of the enemy that Sasuke damaged last, assuming the most recent damage Sasuke put out was bigger than the enemy’s most recent damage. Or something. The last skill is a basic invulnerability.
REVIEW: First skill is fairly overpowered, but it has a huge cooldown, so I guess it’s alright. The damage increase could be way better by reducing all skills instead of those that go over 25. Original doesn’t always mean better. The second skill is balanced but doesn’t have much flow with the first skill, though the invulnerability negation would ensure 50 damage from Chidori. I almost got a heart attack reading the third skill. It’s a near-useless effect that is extremely situational and difficult to understand. That means that it is totally bad. I don’t understand what the point of this skill is either. Spending a random to boost an already overpowered skill and give a near-useless stun won’t do you much justice. It’d at least be nice if it boosted the skills in useful ways, and by skillS, I mean Chidori and Wing Blast. Chidori’s damage does not need to be booted; it’s 50 affliction damage. Reduce the cooldown instead, like “the next time Black Chidori is used, its cooldown will be reduced by 1, and this effect can stack,” and then maybe Wing Blast will deal 10 more damage until its used. Since these improvements will go away when their respective skills are used, they’ll be balanced. Just an idea of how to make this skill useful. It won’t really help the fact that you have little design or flow, though.
CLOSING: Another minimalistic character, it has solid skills but little flow. The third skill is confusing, and it doesn’t help the fact that it’s useless.
SCORE = 3.25/10
Appearance = 0.5/1
Basic template that’s easy to use, but it’s okay. The pictures are very nice and the right terminology is used. However, you lost half a point because of grammar, most notably in the confusing third skill. But you also use “enemies” instead of “enemy’s”. You also misspelled “permanently” in the third skill.
Design = 0.5/2
Sad to say that this character doesn’t seem to be influenced by any grand scheme. I can understand that there are subtle hints of the character trying to harass big damagers, but that’s basically all it has.
Skills = 0.75/2
The character still has no basic design, which already docks a bit of the points off. The first two skills are at least usable, though, and with a bit of tweaking they might be pretty good. The invulnerability doesn’t get a say in this category, so it won’t harm or benefit you.
Balance = 1/2
This character will basically have the same comments as the Skills category. The first two skills are usable, and they’d probably be overpowered without their cooldowns. But the third skill really harms the character and would be so much better off boosting these skills.
Overall = 0.5/3
I’d even prefer one of your “signature” characters, aka the ones that say “if used 1 turn after __, this skill does __”. Even if those weren’t very impressive, this character is still a step backwards from them.
Rasengan_89 wrote:
Character: This one, tsk
For LUX: I know only this one
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Zank & Lux
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: Zank & Lux
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Side Notes Regarding The Character: Pics are colored manga, so dont penalyze me a lot for that. Also, #YOLO, I want 2 negative results lol
ALSO, be realist with the possible in-game situation, do not go extremely far with the possible teams this character may face .__.
Were You Satisfied With Your Previous Review From This Person: Idk.
OH CHRIST ANOTHER ONE

SYNOPSIS: First skill deals some solid DoT and halves the target’s damages while the skill is in play. Second skill negates the defenses of all enemies and makes them only able to attack Obito. Third skill drains all nin and blood from his enemies and deals AoE depending on the amount of chakra removed. The last skill is the passive, which makes him ignore all skills except chakra skills, and this defense is removed when attacked by a chakra skill, and he restores his health to 100 if he goes 3 turns without taking damage.
REVIEW: I get that Obito is supposed to be an overpowered character, but manga logic shouldn’t always be implemented here… First skill would be fine if it didn’t reduce damages by half. Since it has no cooldown, it can become constant, and that’s gonna be more than annoying. The second and third skills are surprisingly balanced. But the fourth skill… you literally win the game if your opponent doesn’t have a chakra user. And he can instantly go back to 100 health if he doesn’t take damage for a while? Unfair. Very unfair. At the very least, it could just ignore the first non-chakra skill and that would lift his defense. That’d be much more balanced. But the way he is, this passive alone would decimate the metagame and force people to either put chakra users in their team or angrily click surrender. Along with the balance issues, he doesn’t have much of a concept or flow. I suppose it’s mostly to harass his enemies and make him survive as long as possible, but that’s pretty much it.
CLOSING: Overpowered balance and minimal design. The ideas in this character are solid and relate to the actual character, but they need to work together better.
SCORE = 4.25/10
Appearance = 0.5/1
The pictures are good and there aren’t any grammar issues. I hate the template, though. It’s sloppy and makes the rest of the text look weird.
Design = 0.5/2
So… what is he supposed to do? I suppose he can ensure a long survival by hampering his opponents’ damages and drain their chakra, but not only is that fairly subtle, it’s also something that’s very easy to accomplish with a character.
Skills = 1.25/2
The skills themselves are pretty good. While the ideas are scattered and the balance is questionable, they’re good ideas and would be interesting to see in the game.
Balance = 0.75/2
The first skill is overpowered and the fourth skill is completely broken. The third and second skills are passable.
Overall = 1.25/3
I’ve said what’s needed to be said.
Luvixi wrote:
Character: SOOO ZETTA SLOW
Whom You'd Want To Review Your Character: Zank and obviously Luvixi
From How Many People You Want Your Character Reviewed: 2
Do You Agree With The Rules Of The Person(s) You Just Applied For: Yes
Were You Satisfied With Your Previous Review From This Person: Yes

btw i like daft punk too
it looks like shit
x[]o Inactive account that's only used to update my showcase. Now using Fennekin as my main account.