Cursed's Poem


 Topic: Cursed's Poem
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  Posted on March 15, 2010 21:59
the_cursed91
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#1
This is my first poem in about 4 months so it's a bit choppy i'm sure and most def not my best.
Just rate it and give me constructive criticism.
Thanks.

This is a double post from last last night. Only one person read it and I would like more feed back on it.
Sorry if this is breaking a rule.


This thing I want most in life,
Is something that drips off the edge of this knife.
What I crave, what I desire..
I'll keep pushing for it, higher and higher.
Its simple really, this thing..
I know its stupid, but I can't help to cling.
Its your respect, your life, your fucking acknowledgement.
It hurts me, it poisons me, its my ailment.
I know this will never come true.
Its stupid to think it would accrue.
I want your love father, nothing more.
But you look through me like an open door.
"Never speak to me again" you say.
I'm sorry father, but I can't obey.
One day I will achieve my goal.
Of filling in my empty hole.
You took a piece of me when you deserted me..
I will get you to respect me, you'll see.
Until that day father..
I won't bother.

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  Posted on March 15, 2010 22:04
khaskislayer
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#2
Nice sig :amused its nice :oh
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  Posted on March 15, 2010 22:09
andoskull
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#3
Wow, that is a deep poem. I can really feel your pain as I read this. ):
10/10
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  Posted on March 15, 2010 22:13
MOBJOBNARUTO
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#4
Wow, thats a really nice poem man. Very deep.
10/10.
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  Posted on March 15, 2010 22:44
ninjagangsta
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#5
10/10 great poem
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