Political Poem

-newhope- Rank: moderator Forum Rank: ANBU Posts: 4953 Joined on: September 20, 2007

#1 Well, I had this assignment from my history class to write a form of expression (essay, poem, etc.) about whether or not I think there should be a sole decision-making body that puts to trial cruel leaders of countries that break international law (kinda like the United Nations). We had to write about whether we think such an organization should exist or whether it would interfere with the individual constitutions of individual nations. I wrote something about the matter. It's not necessarily what I believe, but I give it my best. Discourse throughout the land Alas, what mankind do, To protect thyself and one another kindred too Set up a government with rules Locke would whisper No, let them roam free, Hobbes would say up front Their nature only says they will always behave as runts What a kind of world you live in, my friend, for you and I, while in different blood and thought, retain the same right No sword, pen, or otherwise mere mortal can change this fact We all have eternal and unalienable rights, Locke declares So, as we live our lives in the hustle and bustle, do we ever ponder The very beauty of these rights that we hold that make our existence a wonder? No, you and I are not so different at all, under a different flag we chant our mindless pledges, But we grasp tight against our chest the same rights that bind us A swipe of the pen here or there, No handshake required either to sign this contract Simply sprout arms, legs, and grow some hair You see, you may argue we are of a different domain, There you prove victorious indeed, but wouldn’t you say our existence is rewarded the same? No, not a fluke, not a joke, not a childish game Legally-speaking, you and I are one in the same May colors of banners never bar us from knowing that fact, It is surely wise to have a single entity ensure our morals are kept intact Sovereignty is a proud thing indeed, let it flourish in the minds of the people We need some individuality with where our loyalties lie, Though that should never divide our mutual bond That we have the same unalienable rights, and a single entity must standby to defend them If a leaf falls from the tree of righteousness, let him not be judged by that sole tree Let the entire forest of eternal rights stare into his eyes and be not afraid to read him a sentence If we all are the same in this way, Why do we separate and break this bond and mold it like a degraded clay? Our rights burn more vibrantly in unison, not in dissent Let no government ever say That we are not united in this way A great treachery that should be An even grandiose one should be, if we let them corrupt us like so Then the full manifestation Kant’s doctrine would wither away for sure No longer could man ever unite to face Pandora’s Box arm in arm, No, we’d be more concerned on desensitized flags There we’d see international strife be the harm Please rate, CnC, interpret, and say whether or not you liked it. Thanks for reading. Your Miscellaneous section, your banner. Set by Strawhat-

nara_mono Rank: member Forum Rank: Jounin Posts: 2238 Joined on: June 9, 2007

#2 The poem is really good, and I enjoyed it quite a bit. Especially the references to Locke. It had good flow and structure. But what got me was the rhyme scheme. Completely erratic. Though I'm not saying it should be a certain way, the rhyme sceme makes it lose flow in certain areas. Overall the poem was really good. || Ato Amatoria: Welcome to the world of Tomorrow || I love you. || Hellbound ||

-newhope- Rank: moderator Forum Rank: ANBU Posts: 4953 Joined on: September 20, 2007

#3 nara_mono wrote: The poem is really good, and I enjoyed it quite a bit. Especially the references to Locke. It had good flow and structure. But what got me was the rhyme scheme. Completely erratic. Though I'm not saying it should be a certain way, the rhyme sceme makes it lose flow in certain areas. Overall the poem was really good. Thank you. I considered that using allusions to Locke, Hobbes, Kant, etc. would enrich the poem. Yeah, I didn't want to make it a completely childish poem and rhyme the whole way. I thought that it'd be better it rhyme in some parts and go free verse in others. But if you think that messed up the flow, I'll consider that next I write. Thanks for the comments. Your Miscellaneous section, your banner. Set by Strawhat-

11cartoon Rank: member Forum Rank: Sannin Posts: 5499 Joined on: November 23, 2008

#4 nice poem newhope rly nice ~Epic Icon Showcase~ ~Sexy Sig from MIRA~ ~Neliel's Free Avatars~ ~ Gfx battles Won: 3-0 ~ Avatar by David ~ Fucking sexy Sig by Aya <3 ~ Toon is nice, caring, cool, but...I just raped him! <3 ~ Ele ~ This sig is mine again!!! Better not delete it again, bish. ~Neli

CommanderColin Rank: member Forum Rank: Jounin Posts: 2698 Joined on: October 29, 2006

#5 Nice poem NH. I didnt know you were a writer. I'm glad I didnt get that assignment cause i would hate it lol. Avvy by Uberscout || Sig by Strawhat- || Proud AoP Leader || Bounty Poster Daydreaming days in a daydream nation

-newhope- Rank: moderator Forum Rank: ANBU Posts: 4953 Joined on: September 20, 2007

#6 Thanks Cart. ^^ I'm not, CC. I just thought poetry would be a nice thing for me. Your Miscellaneous section, your banner. Set by Strawhat-

-newhope- Rank: moderator Forum Rank: ANBU Posts: 4953 Joined on: September 20, 2007

#7 ~Bump~ It'd be nice to get more comments on this. Your Miscellaneous section, your banner. Set by Strawhat-

wazup Rank: member Forum Rank: Jounin Posts: 1640 Joined on: October 25, 2006

#8 Oooh very nice hopeh-wah! :3 i hope to see moar of your writingz ima nub gfxer <.< || nub pride || tnx tobi 4 sig || tnx tuesday for the avy || ASIAN PRIDE

-newhope- Rank: moderator Forum Rank: ANBU Posts: 4953 Joined on: September 20, 2007

#9 wazup wrote: Oooh very nice hopeh-wah! :3 i hope to see moar of your writingz Yay, thanks Pretz, I mean, Waz, err...you know what I mean. Your Miscellaneous section, your banner. Set by Strawhat-

Oliverklozof Rank: member Forum Rank: Academy Student Posts: 2 Joined on: November 21, 2009

#10 Bump, I was there in class where -newhope- was announced a winnar for this poem! Chaos, panic, destruction... My work here is done wrote: The alpha numeric einstein table chart states that there are flaws in the combination of multiplication system and that if BOTH numbers in the equation in a 2digit equation are under 11 then you use a different method of using the identity property to come up with your answer. so 1 x 1 will equal 2 in this case. not 11 but 11 x 11 = 1,111 -.-

RawrBeThyName Rank: member Forum Rank: Chuunin Posts: 307 Joined on: September 1, 2010

#11 Very well written, flow's beautifully. I hope to see more work from you, newhope. Retired 11.7.2010

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